Transforming relationships & obtaining innerpeace
We all have seeds within us – seeds of love, seeds of anger, seeds of sadness, seeds of joy, seeds of performance, seeds of people pleasing, seeds of peace, etc. And these seeds are planted in the soil of our soul. Throughout life we learn which seeds we’re supposed to nourish, which seeds society expects us to grow, and which seeds we should suppress. The relationships we’re in and the environments in which we grow all have substantial influence on the seeds which are nourished.
Suffering comes from cultivating the seeds which have the greatest toxicity potential – anger, shame, disconnection, and inadequacy.
Just like a farmer needs tools and specialized equipment when setting out on a new season, so too do we need new tools to learn how to nourish and cultivate the seeds within us which produce innerpeace, happiness, and connection. I provide individuals and couples with tools that help them first and foremost learn how to:
Hold space for their innerworld
Develop deep listening
Create capacity
This process has a very real and long-term impact on communication, conflict resolution, negotiation, parenting, rebuilding trust, intimacy, entrepreneurship, boundaries, self-knowing, and self-confidence – just to name a few of the goals I help clients with.
I want you to know it’s normal to need help. It’s normal to have communication issues and conflict in your relationships. It’s normal to feel stuck in a career. It’s understandable that you might be depressed, anxious, sad, or stressed. What you do with these challenges is what makes the difference and can be the key to working through them.
Today can be the day you start the change you want to achieve.
I believe in helping people obtain thriving and life giving relationships in all areas of life - marriage, romantic partnership, business, social, spirituality, and even your relationship with yourself.
My approach supports you and helps you overcome the unique difficulties in your relationships far more effectively than you could just on your own.
Click here to read some of the most commonly asked questions.
Throughout my career in mental health and learning & development I have found it to be true time and time again that everyone faces challenges, difficulties, and barriers in life, yet, many never seek professional help.
I specialize in helping couples and individuals find freedom, meaning, and purpose in life through mindfulness, inner peace, and understanding. The process I’ve developed has three distinct steps:
Listen and name what you are feeling and experiencing
Understand why you are experiencing these feelings in the way you experience them
Consider what, if any, solution or change is needed
So often we want to quickly jump to step three, but in reality, learning to hold space and create capacity within ourselves through mindfulness truly is the most important part of the process. This is because there are parts within us that want to be connected with, want to be seen, heard, and known. In the words of one of the greatest Zen Meditation Masters of the last century, Thich Nhất Hanh, “The way out is in”.
When we try to circumvent the deep listening process and go directly to implementing a change or a solution, our nervous system doesn’t have a chance to catch up and the protector parts within us go on full alert. This means the change you attempt will be temporary at best. In order to obtain meaningful and life long change we need to learn how to sit with ourselves, sit with our emotions, and develop a practice of deep innerlistening.
Whether you are experiencing a lack of connection in your relationships, or trust has been broken, or you are seeking something greater in life – I can help you journey these paths with the tool of mindfulness. A core belief in my practice is that trauma, in one way or another, impacts all of us. The notion that anyone has a perfectly “normal” childhood is simply a myth. According to Dr. Gabor Maté, “Children become who they need to be to get the love they seek”. The reality is we all learned how to be in relationship based on our childhood experiences and we show up in our adult relationships in those very same ways.
This is why my process always includes an intentional and trauma informed reflection on how your childhood impacts you today and influences the goals you have for the future.
I use an integrated approach consisting of mindful meditation drawn from Buddhism and emotional connection built on Gottman’s theories. I also utilize Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), Internal Family Systems (IFS) parts work, and trauma informed care in both counseling and coaching. I also use skills from Solutions Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT), Motivational Interviewing (MI), and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT).
Generally, what this means for you is that you can be confident you will get the right care tailored to meet your needs based on the fact that an integrated approach doesn’t assume a one-size-fits-all.
Specifically, this means I draw from the most update to date and data driven approaches to help you achieve your goals.